fam04 Resolving without Divorce

Resolving without Divorce
By David Cox
[F04] v1 ©2005 www.coxtracts.com
also see my tract “Principles of a Biblical Marriage”
this tract can be freely copied and photocopied.

It is sad when two people marry and later divorce. But it is worse when there are children involved in these matters. Every Christian should purpose in his heart that divorce is not something that is inevitable. Divorce results when the people involved do not want to obey God. The divorce rate is very high among divorced people (they repeat their divorces over and over again because of the same problems they themselves bring to each new marriage). Wherever they go they will carry their problems with them, and divorce never really solves these problems but is a running away from them which never works. Divorce just complicates their lives.

Divorce is a failure of the marriage – We should clarify, that in these matters, it is popular to “assign guilt” to one party and innocence to the other, but after all, divorce is a failure by both because both have to make the marriage work, and both are responsible before God when it fails.




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fam10 The covetous that hordes

The Covetous that Hordes; Idolizing Possessions and Riches
by David Cox
[fam10] v1 ©2006 www.coxtracts.com
This tract can be freely photocopied and reproduced

Definition of Avarice

This is somebody who desires or presumes is his right to have abundance and live in luxury and pleasure, especially speaking of material things. Contrary to the principles of proportion and the Christian living aware of others (Eph 4:28 Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth.), he lets other suffer while he lives enjoying his goods and riches, enjoying the pleasures of life.




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fam06 Training our Kids

Training our Kids
By David Cox
[fam06] v1 ©2006 www.coxtracts.com
This tract may be freely reproduced for non-profit use.


The Bible in Malachi 2:15 mentions that God hates divorce God “seeks a godly seed.” God commands us very clearly about our children, that we should guide them in the way of God so that they would be saved and serving God. This is not optional, and the manner of doing it is likewise not optional. Some say that they will wait until their kids are adults and let them choose for themselves. This only lets the world educate your children as Satan and our sinful nature would have it.

The obligation to train them

Eph. 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

This verse commands us to bring them up, doing it the correct way against the incorrect (provoke to wrath). “Nurture” means the act of providing direction to live responsibly in this world. “Admonition” means to counsel about stopping or avoid incorrect or improper conduct based on what God has said in His Word. It is a warning in what should or should not be done. Paul commented that Timothy was wise through his knowledge of the Scriptures (2Tim 3:15), and that this is exactly what the Scriptures do when we study them and apply them to our lives. We should do this as adults, but parents equally should do this for their children until they are able to do it for themselves. The OT is full of examples of these types of exhortations (Deu 4:9; 6:7; Psa 78:3-6).

Love demands Discipline

Pro 3:12 For whom the LORD loveth he correcteth; even as a father the son in whom he delighteth.

Heb 12:6 For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7…for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? 8 But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers, then are ye bastards, and not sons. 9 Furthermore we have had fathers of our flesh which corrected us, and we gave them reverence: shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits, and live? The principal point here is that the parent receives the child as his own only if he disciplines the child. The motive for correcting and disciplining our children is not just to chastise them, but to correct their lives so that God doesn’t have to punish them more severely later in their lives. It is love that forces one to discipline, and that has to begin at a young age Pro 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. The child should always hear “we discipline you, because we love you.”

Goals in Disciplining

This instruction is not information only, but it is information about the will of God through the Scriptures (2Tim 3:15) such that it changes his being, his character, his attitude, and his will. This teaching is to help him stop sinning, and it should come from his parents (Pro 1:8-10), and be focused on his fulfilling the will of God (Pro 4:1-4), and recognizing the parents moral values and obeying them by following the pattern of their lives. In the Bible this is “living” so as to obtain eternal life. Isa 38:19 The living, the living, he shall praise thee, as I do this day: the father to the children shall make known thy truth.

Psa 78:3 Which we have heard and known, and our fathers have told us. 4 We will not hide them from their children, shewing to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, and his strength, and his wonderful works that he hath done. 5 For he established a testimony in Jacob, and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers, that they should make them known to their children: 6 That the generation to come might know them, even the children which should be born; who should arise and declare them to their children: 7 That they might set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments: 8 And might not be as their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation; a generation that set not their heart aright, and whose spirit was not stedfast with God. The end or purpose of training our children is so that we pass our Christian faith to them, so that they may be saved, and not forget God, so that they will keep the commandments of God and walk in faithfulness with God.

Respect for Authority:

Exo 20:12 Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee. God promises us that if we honor and respect our parents that God himself will extend our lives on the earth. Col 3:20 Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. 1Pe 2:13 Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake: whether it be to the king, as supreme. In other words, the will of God is that we have respect for all in authority, especially the elderly and our own parents.

Control of One’s Self:

Pro 16:32 He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city. The person who cannot control his own spirit is a threat to society, and is condemned to suffer under the hand of God and the civil authorities. Mat 16:24 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. 25 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. What God imposes in our lives (and in the lives of our children) is that we deny ourselves, and suffer the hard things in order to comply with God’s wishes. Pro 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him. Human character without the influence of God is totally devoid of moral character, and this is seen by the foolish things of the world in his life. Men dedicate themselves to make the biggest ball of rubber bands in the world, as is seen constantly on Ripley’s “Believe it or Not” presenting time after time. Where is the eternal value in such foolishness? What importance will today’s sports have in 100 years? None. Most people hardly even remember it a year later.

Resisting bad influences.

1 Cor. 15:33 says “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.” The goal here is to teach our children to recognize and resist bad influences in the world, their friends, fashions, television, what they see, etc. It is good to remember that the saved are a remnant (Rom. 9:27), and we will never be in the majority or the popular.

To be a server, not selfish

Phil. 2:3 Do nothing out of strife or vainglory; rather with humility, each one estimating the others as superior to himself; 4 not looking each one for his own, but each one also for the others. Part of finding God’s will and staying with it is seeing what God wants from our character. It is Satan’s spirit (Isaiah 14:12-15) to exalt oneself. Prov. 27:2 Let a stranger praise you, and not your own mouth; A stranger, and not your own lips. To be a mature adult Christian who is pleasing to God, one has to focus one’s life on serving others and not being served, seeking to saturate oneself with sensual delights and pleasures.

Spirit of not complaining, but doing everything with a good heart, as for the Lord: Here we see the attitude of the child. Many times your child may agree to do what you tell him to do, but he does not do it in a good spirit, but with murmuring and conflict. Phil. 2:14 Do everything without grumbling and disputing. Col 3:23 And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men. Here we see that God fixes the attitude of our hearts when we do something, even things that seem insignificant to us. Our Christian faith shines through even our “insignificant” activities in our lives because we have joy, peace, and encouragement in everything we do.

We must include here also Job 9:27 “I will forget my complaint, I will leave my sad countenance, and I will strive.” Part of having the right attitude is not to float when it’s something you don’t want to do. One must do what he does with joy of heart, and this joy must be manifested outwardly.

How do we do it?

We must focus on some methods that God has sent for us to instruct our children. The first is for being the spiritual example for our children. The truth is that everything one can say or instruct a child is for nothing if the person teaching him is a hypocrite in his own life before God. The vision that God gives us about this is to take them where we are going. Genesis 18:19 For I know that (Abraham) will command his children and his household after him, to keep the way of the Lord, doing justice and judgment… Abraham’s example is that an obedient believer will always command his own house in the ways of God. This is about the most important thing there is (apart from his own salvation). The influence of a holy life is what changes people. Joshua 24:15 But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. We also see the good example of Joshua in showing dedication and decision in following God and in training his children in the things of God.

Second, we must see that training our children has a moral character. In other words, we are not only dealing with behavior, but also what causes this behavior. Prov. 22: 6 Train up a child in his way, and when he is old he will not depart from it. The word “instructs” comes from the word “palate”. It refers to the custom of mothers when a newborn does not want to drink milk from her breast. He puts honey or sweets on his palate, and if he wants more, he drinks his mother’s milk. This is probably the first thing such a creature learns. Thus the training is to deal with moral principles and rules. This implies that no father can train his children well without going to the Holy Scriptures, studying and teaching them. Sometimes people try to impose morals without reference to the Bible, and this always fails.

Third, we must understand that God commands us to discipline our children in order to impose these moral teachings on them. The point is not to punish them for their bad behavior, but to change their spirit and appearance to obey God. Prov. 3:12 For the LORD punishes the one he loves, as a father punishes the son he loves. Prov. 13:24 He who spares punishment hates his son, but he who loves him corrects him early.

More Tracts from the Family Category

Author Pastor David Cox

Pastor David Cox

fam15 Always late for the house of God

Always Late for the House of God
By David Cox
[fam15] v1 ©2008 www www.coxtracts.com
You may freely reproduce this tract for non-profit use

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Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. Col 4:5

We ask ourselves at times why some of our brethren always arrive late to the house of God. The world we live in grows more complicated and entangled every day, and the demands on our lives and time also grow every day. At times it seems that we will never reach something what appears like peace and tranquility. When we touch on this problem, it is only tip of the iceberg.

We need to take time to reflect and meditate on what we are doing, how we live our lives, and above all, how we relate to our God. The plan and work of Satan is to never allow us peace and calm so that we can reflect, meditate, and order our lives after what pleases God.




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fam17 Submission and Head Coverings

Submission and Head Coverings

By David Cox

[fam17] v1 ©2008 www.coxtracts.com
You may freely reproduce this tract for non-profit use.

1 Corinthians 11:3-16 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God. Every man praying or prophesying, having his head covered, dishonoureth his head. But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that is even all one as if she were shaven. For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered. For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man. For the man is not of the woman; but the woman of the man. Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man. For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels. Nevertheless neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord. For as the woman is of the man, even so is the man also by the woman; but all things of God. Judge in yourselves: is it comely that a woman pray unto God uncovered? Doth not even nature itself teach you, that, if a man have long hair, it is a shame unto him? But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering. But if any man seem to be contentious, we have no such custom, neither the churches of God.




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fam27 Dress of a Christian Woman

dress of christian woman

The Dress of a Christian Woman

By David Cox
[fam27] v1 ©2011 www.coxtracts.com
you may reproduce this freely for non-profit use.

In our world, worldly women generally think that they can dress any way they want. The three universal rules of worldly women seem to be: (1) it has to be comfortable, (2) it has to be attractive, i.e. sexual, sensual, or call attention to one’s self, and (3) it has to “fit” with modern fashion. The Christian woman should not be controlled by this concepts.

But then, what should be the rules that a Christian woman would follow as far as a dress code that pleases God? This is the matter of this tract.

Adam, Eve, and their Shame

Gen 2:25And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
Gen 3:7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons. 10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself. 11 And he said, Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat? Continue reading

fam14 Fathers that Please God

Fathers that Please God

Marks of a Good Father Fathers that please God
By David Cox
[FAM14] v1r ©2008 www.coxtracts.com
You may reproduce this tract if given away for free.

At times men think that they are very good fathers, when in reality they are not. It is not as you think that counts but rather what God has said about the matter. So we should explain what it is that makes a man a good father in the eyes of God. His relationship with God is going to cause the man to conduct himself well with his wife, and also with his children.




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fam31 “Pastor, I am going to get a divorce”

divorce

“Pastor, I am going to get a divorce”
Considerations before getting a divorce
By David Cox
[fam31] v1r ©2009 www.coxtracts.com
You may free reproduce this tract for non-profit purposes.

At times there are people that have so many problems in their marriage and for good or bad, they are firmly decided in getting a divorce. This tract is a presentation of things to think about before going forward, or better said, pastoral advice to avoid the problems a divorce will cause.

In this tract, I, as a pastor, will present answers and arguments that I have heard from people at these crossroads, and hopefully it will be of help to people who are honest and humble enough to accept good advice rather than being bull-headed and doing their own will no matter what spiritual and emotional damage it causes.




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fam16 Christmas: Is it for Christians?

Christmas: Is it for Christians?

By David Cox
[fam16] v1 ©2008 www.coxtracts.com




Jer 10:2 Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen…

Coming to the end of the year, many people begin to think about Christmas. There are many traditions around Christmas, and it is important that we analyze all these traditions and customs in the light of the Bible so we do blindly follow ignorant people into pagan traditions.




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fam02 Seeking a Christian mate

Seeking a Christian Mate

Seeking a Christian mate
By David Cox [email protected]
[fam02] v1 ©2006 www.coxtracts.com
You may freely print this without alterations

Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

The Perfect Will of God – We know that God has a perfect will for each of us. We also understand that at times this perfect will of God does not quite go always as we would like it to go. We want to be happily married, but it appears that God “is not cooperating.” We begin to understand things when we start with the will of God. If a person is not subject to the will of God, they will never encounter peace and tranquility in their life. One has to accept Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and understand that they must daily seek God’s will, or their lives will be nothing more than a great big mess, problem after problem. The key to being happy is to first be saved, then serve God with all your heart and life, and seek after God. Without this, whatever happiness they may think they find is hollow and deceptive. This is the foundation of everything including marriage.




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